Life and Relationships

The basic thing about life is that, it is determined by the relationships we have, this means that the key of making your life interesting or dull is by creating certain relationships. If u want to do it right, then u have to know which ones to make, which ones to avoid and how to maintain the ones that are most important to you.

The relationships we create should be the ones that build a certain aspect of our lives. One thing i have come to notice is that, usually the type of friends you have around you will affect you with a personality trait they have; something that we rarely notice. Lemme give an example, if you have these successful friends who are hardworking, neat and exceptional in what they do and you spend time with them then most likely you will tend to behave and act like them.

Then stick around another group of friends who spend the whole day watching movies, playing video games and just having a “a great time” and see the difference.

Then there are relationships where they either make us happy or they kill our happiness, so slowly we tend even not to notice. If you are lucky and find those friends who; it feels amazing when u are with them. They can be hardworking, dedicated type but when they are in their fun place, then u’ll all have the time of your lives, even if all you do is talk about stupid meaningless stuff.These relationships are the best to have, if u want to enjoy your life.

Then there is the opposite. People who are you’re friends but being with them is effort consuming and strenuous. They drown you without even you knowing it.My advise, cut them off. It may hurt for sometime though it will fade away but continuing with them will make your life miserable.

A point to note is that; Please people don’t confuse the relationships that make you sad with the friends who have depression and anxiety issues please please please. Personally i have a friend like that and she has gone through a lot but i love her and will always be there for her. If u know how depression is then u know being alone through it is not pretty.

Then there are a few exceptions which are the best friends relationships. Those that Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours, those that are the reason your fridge is empty most of the time but are really there for you and are true friends for life.

Basically all relationships in your life fall in those categories and the determine how your life will turn out and it is only you who can choose which to keep and who to let go.

Wise words on life in general

1. It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return.

But what is more painful is to love someone and never

find the courage to let that person know how you feel.

2. A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who

means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was

never meant to be and you just have to let go.

3. The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a

porch swing with, never say a word, and then walk away

feeling like it was the best conversation you’ve ever had.

4. It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose

it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been

missing until it arrives.

5. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an

hour to like someone, and a day to love someone-but it

takes a lifetime to forget someone.

6. Don’t go for looks, they can deceive. Don’t go for wealth,

even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you

smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day

seem bright.

7. Dream what you want to dream, go where you want to go,

be what you want to be. Because you have only one life and

one chance to do all the things you want to do.

8. Always put yourself in the other’s shoes. If you feel that it

hurts you, it probably hurts the person too.

9. A careless word may kindle strife. A cruel word may wreck

a life. A timely word may level stress. But a loving word may

heal and bless.

10. The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best

of everything they just make the most of everything that comes

along their way.

11. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, ends with

a tear. When you were born, you were crying and everyone

around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die,

you’re the one smiling and everyone around you is crying

I read this online some time back and I saved it, today when I was clearing some files I found it and read it again. I don’t know why but I was inspired to post it, so I hope reading this has given u some knowledge on life in general.

Letter to those suffering from Depresion

Hi, am  Herman. I don’t know you and I don’t get what you are going through, chances are your condition may be different from the millions of people out there and chances are that you’d probably say, since I don’t know you,  I can’t really help you. If that is the case I want to ask you a simple question. Do you know yourself?

The reason why am writing this letter to you is because I have gone through severe depression. I have been so deep in it that I lost my personality,  joy, my friends, my family, my outlook on life and basically my life in general. I might not know what you are going through but I know the feeling.

That feeling that everything is worthless, that nothing seems to satisfy what you are looking for, that feeling of not wanting to face the world because of its judging eyes, that feeling of wishing to sleep away the day of locking yourself away, The thoughts of just simply ending it.

So now let me ask you this, if everything is worthless then why are you still here? If you have an answer then it means that you have something worth living for. If you don’t want to face the world, you have to force yourself to find your own way of doing it, cause the world is there and you’ll eventually have to deal, whether you like it or not. One of the worst mistakes I have made is to think I can run away from my life, but the thing is you run so fast and so hard and after a while when you turn back, life is not there, thinking you have succeeded a smile comes to your face only to look by your side and find it there.

If your reading this I want to tell you that running away from your problems will never never be a solution. Yes you might avoid them now, yes, you may delay them now but the reality will eventually set in and the things you are running from will hit you twice as hard.

If you were given one chance of doing something great, one opportunity with all the resources you’d ever need and that which will make you smile, what would you do? Well, the thing is, that chance is life and you have two choices. Choice one, waste it. Choice two, live it to your best.

No one can make that choice for you. It will not be easy and it will never be. It’s all about cause and effect. I apologize if am harsh but that’s reality.  The choice is yours.

The choice is yours!!

Life comes with challenges, hurdles, and curve balls which sometimes seem too much to handle. You walk down the street smiling at strangers yet deep inside you are crying; tears fall but no one sees what is really happening. People might know you but have no clue who you really are. Sometimes you are in a crowd yet you feel so alone, forcing yourself to talk to others maybe cause you’re just expected to; but not really talking. Feelings of uncertainty, confusion, and fear of the unknown cloud your mind.

Well sometimes life is crap, I have been there and I even wrote part of it in my lowest point in life. But I got to know that the beautiful thing about life is that you have a choice. You might choose to stay in that dark place and just live that way or you might choose to wanna be better. The choice is never easy, trust me, especially if you have been in a really deep depression cause I have been there and maybe am still there I really don’t know but I know am becoming better.

If you want your life to mean something then you want to be better, you can do this by practicing the following of which has helped me see things in a new light.

 Look at your problem in the context of your entire life.  Ask yourself:  How important is this difficulty in the overall scheme of things?  What will this matter ten years from now?   Ok so you got diagnosed with depression, It won’t significantly affect the rest of your life but then that’s according to you. The key is to see the problem for what it is. Think often about how you fit into the “big picture.”  Ask yourself:  Why am I here?  What is my mission in life?  Am I following my purpose?  I’ll be the first to admit that I never used to think about such issues.  But I do now.

Wake up to the miracles all around you.  Whether you realize it or not, you are part of an extraordinary universe.  Spectacular, mind-boggling things are happening every second.  For instance, you breathe, your heart beats and you digest food all without any conscious effort.  Tulips know when to pop up through the ground at precisely the right time each and every year. So, shake your ho-hum attitude and begin to appreciate the amazing intelligence guiding the universe!

Extend yourself to others.  We tend to get mired in our own problems, turning inward and growing depressed and frustrated.  Finding ways to serve and help others will make you feel better and broaden your understanding of the interconnectedness of all human beings.  Even something as simple as offering a few encouraging words to someone else can make a world of difference–to them and to you.

Redirect your focus to the many blessings in your life.  Are you in reasonably good health?  Do you have your eyesight and mobility?  Is there a roof over your head and enough food in the refrigerator?  There are many people who do not enjoy these gifts and who would gladly trade places with you.  So, focus on the many things for which you are grateful for.

View every problem as an opportunity for growth.  Too often, we see our difficulties as negative experiences which are there to punish us and cause pain.  As you look back on your life, you’ll find that many problems and painful situations led to personal growth and improved conditions.   So, develop a strong belief that the “bad” experience is there to help you in some way.  Don’t curse your challenge; instead, look for the lessons or opportunities which your problems are showing you.  Life is much more remember that.

Blog of the Year 2012 award

Blog of the year award wow, i didn’t expect this at all when i started the blog but thanks so much II 4S Aopmrdd for putting me with the best of inspirational writers.

I really never knew about the blog of the year 2012 award, but you have to admit it sounds really cool doesn’t it?

Here are the ‘rules’ for this award:

1 Select the blog(s) you think deserve the ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award

2 Write a blog post and tell us about the blog(s) you have chosen – there’s no minimum or maximum number of blogs required – and ‘present’ them with their award.

3 Please include a link back to this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award – http://thethoughtpalette.co.uk/our-awards/blog-of-the-year-2012-award/ and include these ‘rules’ in your post (please don’t alter the rules or the badges!)

4 Let the blog(s) you have chosen know that you have given them this award and share the ‘rules’ with them.

5 You can now also join our Facebook group – click ‘like’ on this page ‘Blog of the Year 2012’ Award Facebook group and then you can share your blog with an even wider audience [I cannot join that group as I am not on Facebook].

6 As a winner of the award – please add a link back to the blog that presented you with the award – and then proudly display the award on your blog and sidebar … and start collecting stars…

Yes – that’s right – there are stars to collect!

Unlike other awards which you can only add to your blog once – this award is different!

When you begin you will receive the ‘1 star’ award – and every time you are given the award by another blog – you can add another star!

There are a total of 6 stars to collect.

Which means that you can check out your favourite blogs, and even if they have already been given the award by someone else, then you can still bestow it on them again and help them to reach the maximum 6 stars!

For more information check the FAQ on The Thought Palette.

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I have read some pretty amazing blogs before and i will try my best to give as many as possible and add others in time.  I will very probably forget many deserving blogs but will one day put them on the list.

Please share this with other bloggers cause i personally think this initiative is a really motivating and cool one.

my nominees are:

amaeguerrero

hastywords

kiramoorescloset

theramblingphilosopher

jennovafoodblog

Space for lasam

Ron Scubadiver’s Wild Life

Bealtaine Cottage

I Can’t Take it Anymore! How to Deal with Really Tough Situations

Having a sense of purpose can really make the difference when you’re having an “I can’t take it anymore” moment.

There are definitely things you can do to feel better and focus on the more positive aspects of your situation.

And they do help a lot…

But this article is about something else…

What makes something an “I can’t take it anymore” moment usually is just that you want something else.

So take all the emotion out of it…

And the “poor me” bit…

And notice that you just want something else right now.

Now you have a choice…

You can continue on with the “poor me”, emotional self-torture if you want…

I know I did for longer than I care to admit.

There’s nothing wrong with feeling bad or torturing yourself.

It just doesn’t feel good…

And it rarely gets you what you want in life.

So if you want to feel better and have a fulfilling life, you’re going to have to do something different.

One way to deal with a really tough situation is to look at it as a necessary learning and/or growing experience.

Maybe there is a purpose to it all!

Maybe the universe isn’t random…

Maybe this is part of your training program.

I like to think of myself as always being in training for something that I don’t know about.

It’s preparing me for my future…

And it doesn’t matter if I know what “it” is…

I like to think that I have complete trust in an intelligent universe and a caring and loving God (insert your preferred higher power here…)

And I remind myself of it a lot…

Like when I forget occasionally…

Because sometimes I forget and think life sucks.

And I’ve had some really big challenges in my life, but I know I’m not the only one…

Everyone has big challenges…

But when we think of it as if it’s just part of our training program that is preparing us for really wonderful things…

It makes it a little easier…

To do what needs to be done.

And if you want to know more about dealing with challenges…

There’s a really great book out there called “Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor Frankl.

He was a concentration camp prisoner who managed to come out alive.

If ever there were a book that could tell you about how to deal with those “I can’t take it anymore” moments, this is the book.

He said that surviving a concentration camp required mental and emotional strength.

And he talks about who survived and how in the book…

If it worked for someone in a concentration camp, maybe it will help you deal with your situation…